arrogance, mine (p2)
I just encountered one of my old entries, entitled “on my arrogance”. Hmmm. I have changed a lot: I’m still arrogant, but I definitely don’t think I am intellectually superior to any meaningfully large segment of the populace– i.e., there are some people who are stupider than I, and a lot who are smarter. See what just a couple of years of college does to you? Or maybe it’s because I’m no longer being influenced by the liberal artsy, introspective ambiance of the Honors College. I’ve noticed my common usage vocabulary has dropped– for instance notice how I wrote all of that verbiage instead of saying repertoire of words– so I no longer ‘test’ people’s understanding in that manner. To think of it, I don’t think I did; in fact, I wrote a lot of things in that entry that make me think in retrospect that I was choking on a blunt at the time.
I had an interesting conversation with my dad today, and several with my roommate this summer, which point out clearly to me in what way I’m arrogant. I definitely think that only SETM — science, engineering, technology, and math — fields are worthwhile. On an intellectual level, I know that isn’t, can’t be true, but on a purely visceral level, I cling to the conception that historians (conversation with my dad), soccer players (conversations with my roommate), and their ilk are just wasting everyone’s time, and their own potential. I am, however, getting better at accepting the usefulness of other fields, as I come to realize my own limitations within my own area of interest more and more. For instance, now that I know despite how much I think I like math, I will probably never amount to a first rate mathematician, I can appreciate that others choose to play soccer instead of do math. And not only in that negative manner: I can also appreciate that the world might just need historians (and soccer players), for some weird reasons that I can’t see, wearing my SETM tunnel-vision glasses. Give me a few more years, and hopefully I’ll be better able to articulate why the world couldn’t just consist of people interested in the things I’m interested in.
Possibly relevant posts:
- on my arrogance
(12/8/2001) - Endless nothing (8/23/2003)
- Whoa! (3/13/2002)